VIB: Mango Lime

VIB Vacation in a Bottle Mango Lime.
I'll be honest, here. This drink is a lot like that Neuro I reviewed a few weeks ago. As in it's not an energy drink, but more of a health/relaxation beverage. And I'm okay with this.
The bottle states "The Happy Relaxation Drink." They weren't kidding. This has a tasty tropical feel to it, with the mango/lime combo they injected into it. It, like the Neuro I mentioned above, is lightly carbonated, so it is still technically "soda," but lacks many of the harmful ingredients like high-fructose corn syrup, and stuff like that. And for that reason, I tip my hat the the gents at VIB for keeping their products shit-free.





The bottle is a tall aluminum can with a screw-on cap. Kinda like those aluminum Mountain Dew bottles that are like limited edition or something... I remember they sold the Halo 3 Game Fuel in the cans for a while...
But anyway, I can't say this beverage made me more energetic... because that's not what it's supposed to do. I DO feel relaxed a bit, but seeing as how I've got stuff I have to do today, I can't make an accurate measurement of how relaxed I get.


FINAL VERDICT: 6 6.5 out of 10.
It was good, but not THAT good. Wasn't too impressed. It was like drinking carbonated juice. Not usually my thing, but I'm okay with it for now.

However, having seen their website, and hearing the slow ska/reggae theme song they've got, that makes me rethink my verdict. I bumped it up from 6 to 6.5 out of ten.

Bawls: G33K B33R

The Bawls G33K B33R, upon first open, foamed like all good root beers do. The foam AND the vapor from the high caffeination is exactly what I like to see, and exactly what I expect from an offshoot beverage of Bawls' calibur.
The fact that the Bawls people added some 1337 5P34K into the drink's title makes me smile. I am a longtime nerd, and I like seeing the nerd in all of us brought out in mainstream products.
The flavor of the G33K B33R is awfully similar to an A&W Rooty. It's smooth-textured, and you can't even tell that there's added caffeine and guarana. The flavor is very nonchalant in that way.





The energy boost, like the original flavor Bawls, consists of simple, not-over-the-top ingredients. Mostly just caffeine and guarana. Not much else. But in this particular instance, less is more.
I should also point out that Bawls drinks are exceptionally hard to find unless you know where to look. In my last Bawls review, I stumbled on that in a gas station convenience store. This time, however, I was tipped off that G33k B33R was spotted in the wild at Fred Meyer for $1.89 a go (thanks, Kevin). MUCH cheaper than at that damn Kwik-e-Mart. While I was there, I picked up an original Bawls, as well, taking advantage of the opportunity as I saw it.


Final verdict: 9 out of 10.
While the flavor was delicious, and the bro sover at Bawls don't dissapoint, I thought it couldn't hurt to have done something more unique with the root beer flavor. True, it is an American classic flavor, but a little ingenuity and innovation is always nice.

Rockstar Energy Cola

Previously ignorant of this alternative flavor of the popular energy drink, the Rockstar Energy Cola was a run-of-the-mill cola, aside from a bit of an energetic kick. I detected a the smooth cola flavor first off. Tasted pretty much like any other cola, in my honest opinion. Did I mention that I think Coca-Cola and Pepsi taste the same? Same deal here. Wasn't too enthused, but at least it was pleasant. Unlike SOME drinks I've had in the past.
The 16 oz can was some kind of brushed aluminum. Not all shiny like most cans. But the black, silver, and gold color scheme made for a bit of eye-candy.






The energy supplement portion of is was insanely unoriginal, I thought. Guarana, taurine, caffeine, ginseng, and B-vitamins. Pretty usual, I suspect.
The energy this drink gave me was typical. I felt a little bloated, actually... and I think I may have some heartburn. I don't know that I can blame it entirely on the Rockstar, but it definitely played its part. "Double Strength" is right.
I DID find it odd that there's a little American flag on the can towards the back and in tiny letters it says "AMERICAN MADE." As if being made in America changed the flavor or anything...
Final verdict: 6 out of 10. It was tasty enough to keep me drinking, but I wasn't really impressed. Needs... more to the flavor.

Bawls

This stuff is exceedingly hard to find around here. Jesus.
Also, prepare for many immature double entendres.
But anyway... a haphazard trip to a dingy little gas station close to college led me to this appropriately colored blue-bottled drink. I knew of the big flavor Bawls packs, but I never could find it anywhere. I had looked far and wide for the 10-ozer with the name that's easy to make puns out of...
Bawls. Big, blue, tasty Bawls. So imagine my surprise when I walk into the little quick-e-mart sort of thing, and see a case full'o Bawls.
I grabbed two, paid for them (the five dollars or so seemed expensive, but it was worth it for such a rare and hard-to-find item), drove home, and popped one of thes Bawls open. All over into my mouth.
I gotta say... the first whiff of sweet Bawls smell was intriguing. But the flavor definitely lived up to its reputation. It was smooth, lightly carbonated (much like a Red Bull), and very sweet. Reminded me of beer if beer had less hops and more sugar. But tenfold. Definitely a unique blend. And not in a bad way.
The energy kick I'm getting from the drink is right around what I would call a standard. If such a thing exists. I'm feeling perky and alert, and typing a bit faster than usual. It would seem a majority of the energy-ness comes from high caffeine and guarana content. And that's about it. No Tauring, no L-Carnitine... just the bare minimum. And that may work to Bawls' advantage.





The packaging is very appealing to me. I would be funny if it came in a sack... a Bawls Sack... but a bottle is the tiptop classy way to drink ANY carbonated beverage. Bottled sodas rock. And Bawls is no exception.
120 calories per bottle... not bad. The "Ingredient" list was awfully short. I think that's probably a good thing. Less additives and such. So it's healthier than, say, a Rockstar. It DOES have a variation of the generic disclaimer... it doesn't go too in-depth, stating merely, "Warning: This product contains high levels of cafeine." Subtle, but sufficient.
My final verdict: 9.5 out of 10. This stuff is amazing. The presentation, the name, the flavor, the kick... I love Bawls. It's not PERFECT, but it's still pretty damn good. But it was a bit expensive. $2.39. Could have just been the gas station, but I dunno...

Sobe No Fear Super Energy Supplement

Ker-KLACK
Upon opening my black-and-red aluminum-clad beverage, a scent of pomegranate and maybe cherry found its way to my notsrils. The flavor of the No Fear Super Energy Supplement by Sobe was much more intense. I personally found it to be a bit over-the-top as far as flavor is concerned. It left a sort of tangy, sour aftertaste, which I don't care for. After a few more sips, the funky flavor became even more apparent, staining my tastebuds with that starchy "dry" feeling you get when you eat too much pomegranate. Or potatoes. Something like that.
The energy kick was good. Not spectacular, but at the very least noticable. The standard energy blend of caffeine, guarana, L-carnitine, taurine, and a mix of arginine and inositol kept me at least alert and energetic to a point.





Having been produced by Sobe, I expected something more along the lines of health and fitness and such. The original Sobe drinks were always a personal favorite, partially for their flavor and for the healthy aspect.
This drink manages to be about the same as a Monster, in terms of health. 260 calories, versus the usual 240 I see everywhere else...
I bought this one for $2.19 at the Chevron down the street. I don't know about you, but that seems a little spendy, to me. $2.00 seems appropriate. $1.50 is even better. But $2.19? Meh.

My final verdict: 6.4 for an all-around weird taste, unpleasant aftertaste, and for being just a tad too pricey for me.

NeuroBliss

Hm.
Interesting, to say the least.
This Neuro Bliss beverage I found in my college's book store had me a bit confused when I first popped it open. The Health factor seems to be this comestible's main focus.
Cracking the plastic sealed cap issued the telltale "puff" of a soda (or, to be more politically correct, carbonation). The steam/vapor liefted from the revealed mouth of the clear plastic bottle. THe flavor... not too impressive, to be honest. Not too sweet, or sour, or fruity... I suppose I could compare it to tea, in the flavor department. I was half-expecting (after that showy opening) it to be loaded with flavors to offset any health-beneficiary ingredients that wouldn't be as agreeable to the tastebuds. But I suppose I was only half right. There is SOME flavor, I just can't quite pin down what it is. It's something of a neutral bland flavor. In all honesty, I think some of the flavor may come from the carbonation itself.






But moving on, the ingredients on the bottle are what caught my attention. Acetyl-L-Carnitine, L-Phenylalanine, 5-Hydroxytryptophan, L-Theanine, Eleutherococcus senticosus, Rhodiola rosea, and ginkgo bilola. No caffeine. No taurine. No guarana, and no extensive sugar (9g in the whole bottle). And all for 35 calories per bottle. Yup. Definitely healthy. Which, let's be honest, it a good thing for me, personally. I've had so many of those Red Bulls and Full Throttles that my blood could very well make a delicious syrup for pankakes, waffles, and pastries.
The description on their website says "NeuroBliss is happiness in a bottle. Bliss promotes relaxation without drowsiness, relieves anxiety and enhances overall mood, allowing you to concentrate."
I can certainly say that their description is pretty close. I feel relaxed. Not energized as usual. Of course, either way I'm lazy as all hell, but...
Final verdict: 6.5/10 for keeping it healthy, staying true to the "relaxation" thing, but the taste... the taste took some gettng used to, and that's what knocked down the score. Oh, it was also pricey. Like $2.49, I think...

Venom: Death Adder Fruit Punch

The whole Venom experience is quite a departure from the generic "energy drink" persona. The Venom: Death Adder is no exception. I should point out how I really like the entire Venom line, just based on their originality. All their flavors are named after some sort of deadly serpent (Death Adder - Fruit Punch, Killer Taipan - Mango, Black Mamba - Original, et cetera). Their cans are thick aluminum with a legitimate screw-on cap. Not some chintzy aluminum mockery. But I digress...





The Death Adder variety of Venom is fruit punch-flavored. In all honesty, it tastes like that questionable fruit punch at that party you went to. Only, the punch hit up on steroids on the way to the party. Which, flavor wise, is a good thing.
The texture of the beverage (and all Venoms, really) is smooth and feels frothy, even though it appears to be a regular soft drink. I am a big fan of this.
The energy content of Venom, dubbed the "Venom Potency Pack" contains Ginseng Extract, Taurine, L-Carnitine, Guarana, Inositol, Glucuronolactone, and Maltodextrin, and caffeine. This stuff got me buzzing pretty hard.
They weren't kidding when they said "Piercing Energy that Strikes Back." That's for sure.
240 calories total, nothing out of the ordinary there...
Honestly, I don't have much else to say about this particular drink. The flavor is pretty rad (I prefer the original Black Mamba flavor, myself, but for the sake of reviewing...), the texture is a smooth, frothy one that must be tried to be believed. The energy was sufficient, and the price isn't exhorbetant. I've noticed that for 16.9 FL oz, you're actually paying a few cents less than a 16-oz Monster. Or so I have seen. May not be true in specific environments. But regardless, it's slightly bigger for about the same price (maybe less), and packs an "equal-to-or-greater-than" punch as compared to the Monster standard.
Final verdict: 9/10 for good flavor, good buzz, decent price, interesting texture, but what's up with the thick aluminum that I can't crush with one hand in a fit of testosterone-and-caffeine-driven victory?

Monster Nitrous: Super Dry

The Nitrous Monsters are a unique bunch, I think. This specific one, the "Super Dry," which comes in the green can has a sort of citrus-y flavor that I can't quite put a finger on. The can is a 12 FL oz-er, so noticably smaller than the average energy drink can. And that's sort-of a turn off, I suppose... I like some girth to my beverages. I don't mean DUB girth, but... at least 16 FL oz.
As far as the can design goes, It's like the old Jolt cans (from before they had a pull-tab), only much smaller. It's got that aluminum screw-on cap that pops when you open it, issuing a cool white vapor that adds to the excitement I feel whenever I open ANY drink, let alone this one.
In the drink's description, they mention how nitrous oxide (not to be confused with NOS) has been added to the drink. Which in effect goes only as far as nitrogenated water. Basically just adds to the "fizz."




I don't knock Monster for doing something interesting with their drink. I find the Super Dry to be fairly pleasing to the tastebuds.
As far as the boost goes... I can't notice a whole lot. At least, nothing more than a regular Original Monster would give. So the kick is so-so.
Listed in the can's "energy blend" are the usuals... caffeine, L-carnitine, Glucose, guarana, and some ingredients that I don't see too often in energy drinks; Glucuronolactone, inositol, maltodextrin, and yerba mate.
in the health department, I see a lack in high-fructose corn syrup, and the can in its entirety is only 160 calories. A good call for those trying to cut down on calorie intake, in terms of buzz/calorie ratio, while still aiming for something mildly tasty.
Still, the can's got that "pregnant women/children/caffeine-sensitive indivuduals" disclaimer that I like on my drinks... makes me feel edgy. But for an average human being, the disclaimer is probably wise advice. They should probably add "people with heart problems," too. But that's just me...
My final verdict is thus: 8/10, for good flavor, good buzz, lacking a bit in size, at least for me, and healthier than an original Monster.

AMP Lightning

If actual lightning were sour and lemon-scented, the name would be the perfect fit. AMP Lightning is essentially the AMP formula (Monster plus Mountain Dew) with added lemonade flavor. I did find the lemon-y flavor to be enjoyable and not too overbearing, and there seemed to be enough "sweet" in the mix to keep me coming back for another gulp. But still not the most exciting flavor I've ever had...
The can itself was a more-or-less simple yellow-and-black can with the active ingredients listed around the rim at the top... you know, like every energy drink ever has done.




But regardless, AMP isn't known to be too adventurous in their can designs. Pretty much just shifting colors around.
As far as energization (I made that word up... I think) goes, the buzz is pretty standard. Noticable, but by no means revolutionary. The energizing ingredients are pretty standard; caffeine, taurine, ginseng, guarana, L-carnitine, and the ambiguous "B-vitamins" tag. Which I guess is supposed to make it look healthy, or something. At 220 calories for the whole can, it's at least one-tenth the entire day's calorie intake, assuming you're on a daily 2,000 calorie diet. Which is pretty normal.
Overall, I enjoyed this drink, but it's ultimately somewhat forgettable.
Final verdict: 7/10 for mildly enjoyable taste, okay buzz, but lacking in originality.

Full Throttle Berry

I don't usually drink berry-flavored beverages. Always kinda figured them to be on the "girly" side of the energy spectrum. Sorta like when a guy and a girl go to a bar. The guy orders a beer, the chick orders a fuzzy navel.
This Full Throttle Berry has more berry flavor than some other drinks I've tried, and I suppose that's a good thing. It's got that bold flavor that says, "I'll keep you up until four in the morning, brah!" And I admire that. Granted, that "four in the morning" thing is all relative. Just don't drink it past 6PM and you'll be fine.
Anyway, I liked the flavor. Obviously "berry". It had that kick that I have grown accustomed to in my travels.




The can design stays true to the Full Throttle brand, looking exactly like the other cans, only red instead of blue, or black, or what have you. I've always been a fan of product uniformity.
In the energy department, this Full Throttle certainly delivers. It's not to the effect of that Monster I drank a few days ago, but then again, that drink had size on its side. This can is a standard 16 FL oz-er that'll keep the run-of-the-mill office worker or college student on task and out of la-la land (I speak of course about sleeping).
While the flavor and energy are paired well, the health of this beverege is no worse than a can of Coca-Cola. I've wondered about the role high-fructose corn syrup plays in our dietary health as a collective, and I still have no definitive answer. Regardless, this drink has HFCS, 230 calories, and that disclaimer that says "not recommended for children, pregnant or nursing women, or those sensitive to caffeine". But then again, the only energy drink I've ever seen that hasn't had that disclaimer is Red Bull. And in all honesty, the health factor never really bothered me, anyways. I'm a 130-lb 20-year-old college student, with the metabolism of the Flash.
Final verdict: 8/10 for good flavor, good energy, but kinda girly and not necessarily healthy.

Hydrive Energy X Antioxidant Blend

The red beverage in a clear plastic bottle was displayed with three or four other flavors. I couldn't decide at first whether I wanted the green, blue, or red variety. So I chose one at random. And the Hydrive Energy X (the red one) was the result of my random decision.
I hadn't read nearly anything on the bottle, aside from "Antioxidant Formula," so the only assumption I had made was that it would be a very welcome healthy alternative to the junk I usually pound down.




When popped off the cap, I expected to hear the hiss of carbonation. Imagine my surprise when the result was much like that of a water bottle. Silent, more or less.
But anyway... onto my opinion. The flavor displayed on the bottle was "tripleberry," which seemed accurate. It was very fruity, tangy, yet refreshing at the same time. I suppose the lack of carbonation is to thank for that. It was almost like gatorade dor powerade, only with less of a bland, watery flavor that feels sorta half-assed.
Overall, a mildly enjoyable flavor. Not over-the-top, and not too watered-down.
The bottle is a 15.5 FL oz, so a reasonable size, but the real kicker is the antioxidant formula in sync with the energy blend (which just consists of 145mg of caffeine)
The antioxidants (according to the bottle) are EGCG, Polyphenols, Ginko Biloba, Selenium, Zinc, and grape seed extract. At 30 calories a bottle, not bad.
So it's healthy, that's a plus. It's flavor is "meh"...
My final verdict: 6.8/10

Monster DUB Edition

This massive 32 Fl oz Monster (that's 946 ml, folks) was obviously decorated with basketball players in mind. Being not of the "sporty" sort, I had no clue what "DUB" was prior to spotting this can in the cooler at the Chevron down the street. But regardless, I heeded my own policy, and purchased this unfamiliar beverage for the sake of expanding my tastes.
I was expecting some sort of gatorade clone, honestly, as that's the only drink I can associate with sports. But what caught my taste buds was the purple-icious grape flavor. Tasted rather like a grape Otterpop. Which isn't BAD, per se... I suppose for as big a company as Monster, they could have afforded a little originality.




With flavor squared away, I want to reiterate the size of this thing. It's enormous. 32 fluid ouunces. This is practically a liter of purple lightning juice. If I were a big guy, that would be okay with me. But I'm scrawny. So this is a little unnerving and I doubt I can finish this whole thing in one sit.
So now I move on to the energy content. This bad boy has the energy blend that has made Monster among the top three energy drink producers, financially speaking. Taurine, ginseng, L-carnitine, and numerous B-vitamins. I DID notice, however that there is no high-fructose corn syrup, which I'm not sure what to make of. Some groups insist that HFCS is no more a contributor to obesity problems than normal sugar is... but I digress. HFCS isn't in this drink, and I'm not sure what that means.




I find myself in the usual "energized" mood that I have begun to associate with Monster products. Slightly more alert, my fingers are moving faster along my keyboard, and I seem to be thinking quickly. But that's what the energy drinks are for, right?
So... it has the grape flavor, a huge can, the same-old energy ingredients, a pretty decent buzz... overall I think this has potential. It's no killer product, and I feel that the can can be intimidating for casual energy-drinkers.
My verdict: 6.5 out of 10.

UPDATE A few hours later, I feel slightly sick to my stomach. Imma drop my verdict down to 5.8 out of 10.

SLAP Green Tea Energy: Crisp Apple

Having cracked open this silver, green and black can, I wasn't sure what to expect. It certainly wasn't what I tasted. A light, very natural-tasting apple flavor with a slight minty addage. The initial flavor and texture of the drink was smooth. Not as harsh as say a Jolt, or a Red Bull. Seemed like a good "starter" drink for blokes who aren't used to the vice of caffeine and taurine, and the huge flavor that usually comes with it. It's an acquired taste. But I digress...
I found this one to be a "sipper" drink. Not one that you go out of your way to pound down, but one that you can drink while, say watching a movie. Or something to that effect.




Now as far as the resulting energy goes, It DOES deliver something of a kick. The text on the can says it's jitter-less. I think it may have lied a little, there. I'm feeling slightly jittery, but then again, nothing really makes me jittery. Nope, not even a BFC Monster.
Anyway, big flavor; check, big energy; check, now how about the health factor?
It says it has "better-for-you" ingredients. Which I suppose is halfway true. There's some green tea solids and a substitute sweetener called Isomaltulose (made from sucrose via bacterial fermentation), which is good, but there's also the usual generic "energy blend" like caffeine, taurine, niacin, guarana extract, et cetera. So not as bad for you as, say, a Rockstar, but still no Elixir of Life.
All in all, an enjoyable drink. Out of ten, I'd give it an 8.5

Energy and Me

Despite the fact that they'll likely consume and render it useless, my heart has a special place for energy drinks of all kinds. I drink them, and they, in return, make life a little more exciting and me a little more jittery. Which I'm totally cool with.
I like to think I have something of an experienced palate as far as "energized beverages of the carbonated persuasion" go. They are my vice.


In this here blog, you can follow me in my journey to taste every drink, crack every can, and pop open every bottle from here to Afghanistan and back. If you have requests of drinks I should try, by all means, send me an email at "fonthecon@gmail.com". Being underage, I can't quite sample the drinks with alcoholic content, such as Joose or Budweiser's B^3... doesn't mean I can't be knowledgeable, however.

Se we're off, and let's hope my vital organs don't fail along the way.